Hey there strangers!

My life has... changed. SOOO much. My last post on here was about junior prom! haha... oh wow. That just seems like such a different point of my life. Well for starters, I'm no longer in a relationship. Things were just not right... I didnt really like who I was when I was with topher there towards the end. It felt wrong... When I broke up with him I was indeed sad, but I also felt so FREE. It was crazy! Then there was summer... what an experience. I got a car, license, my first job... and fell SUPER hard for a guy. Just a warning, I'm going to sound suuper cheesy and stupid and cliche to you guys... but it's real feelings. He was my best friend. I fell for him freshmen year, and got betrayed... so my heart didn't trust him there for a while. Then all of sophomore and beginning of junior year, he openly expressed his feelings for me. But there was one issue... I was with Chris.I think back on it now... when I had my choice between dating Him or Topher.. if He didn't go to a different school during that time, I would have picked him. I know i would have. He KNEW me. How i felt... what i wanted... what I needed. He knew. He's everything I look for in a guy. Tall, cute, fit, funny as FUCK, spontaneous, creative.. and i broke his heart. It was a difficult situation for me y'know. I was all wrapped up in Topher and then my best fucking friend decides to confess his love... I mean shit. Tough choice. I always had had feelings for the kid, but I was so scared to leave a guy that was so invested in me, for a guy who had hurt me once before. I was terrified. When I got back together with Topher after Christmas break... He left me. He didn't talk to me for the whole rest of the year... and it absolutely killed me. I tried to ignore it.. but i couldnt. And it also didnt help the He was in two of my classes and i saw Him every friggin day. I loved him. Before my split with topher, he finally reached out to me. Confessing every thought and feeling that I had felt during the time we werent speaking. I wasn't the only one... TBC..